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Jupiter Ascending Movie Review: Wrongly Aims the Earth, the Abrasax Empire Collapses in Jupiter Ascending

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Jupiter Ascending Movie Review: Wrongly Aims the Earth, the Abrasax Empire Collapses in Jupiter Ascending

This review contains mild spoilers


First thing crossed our mind once we were asked what goes wrong with this movie is that Mila Kunis (Black Swan, Friends With Benefit) being a janitor. No one will believe that such pretty face holds brush and cleans up toilets, will they? Well, this ain’t that kind of Cinderella story anyway.

More things cross the line when Caine Wise (Channing Tatum) appears, saves, and explains the bizarreness to Jupiter Jones (Kunis). Out of nowhere, Jones is the genetic reincarnation of Abrasax Queen, the mother to three ambitious-born leaders; Balem (Eddie Redmayne), Titus (Douglas Booth), and Kalique (Tuppence Middleton). Once Jones acknowledges her fate, her expression changes into complexion of being pleased and puzzled. Pleased that she is finally no longer nobody and later confused on how such a scientific miracle can fall upon her. “Seriously?”


The mastermind behind the premise, the eccentric Wachowski Brothers, have gained fame through this genre and have produced some notable works including The Matrix Trilogy (1999-2003) and V for Vendetta (2006). Unfortunately, this 1-year-postponed sci-fi flick doesn’t hit well and even crashes the earth like a mess. Bias background leaves too many plot holes. Too many unnecessary elements to transform the pretty janitor into another Queen of Universe just confuse us from beginning to the end.

The hype of Tatum’s A-Class-performance in Foxcatcher can’t help much. Redmayne who is the greatest contender in this year’s Oscar can’t save either, even with his best shocking scream. His empire collapses just like that and he even falls to death in the debris, oops. The release postpone is fatal, so unwise, and such a boomerang for both, especially Redmayne who has been working hard putting his name into the serious A-List.

Speaking the truth. The ensemble cast is actually promising and doing fine. It’s the script which ruins all; sloppy and cheesy, leaving Tatum looks like a deranged skyjacker and Jones into a difficult gravity ride. The rest just follow and even go worse.


Talking further on characters, everyone also gets its part of being superfluous, especially in fashion. We don’t even care much about Jones changing her dress into a more appropriate leather-kicking outfit so that she can move more flexible. Titus even rocks his way too much away from elegance; making himself look more like a metrosexualist rather than a aristocrat. A fashion police should have been invited to criticize and perhaps, a makeover on their political wedding’s makeup and costumes.

The worst comes to final when it’s revealed that the whole chaos is an impact of Abrasax’s family business whose main activity is manufacturing immortal liquid by cannibalizing humans on earth. While watching, we couldn’t stand mumbling “Someone … please stop this family madness.” and hoping something to appear and help this flick to be sane. Promptly answered, we’re given a climax with quite tolerable action scenes and visual effect enchantment. It’s just that, unfortunately, these still couldn’t save the movie from the collapse.

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